Pinterest is full of inspiring idea and encouraging articles. The pins are usually so gorgeous and perfect. But that’s not always what you’re looking for. Sometimes you need a post that addresses the nitty gritty of motherhood. Not just a pretty pin to save for later, but something that addresses the embarrassing topics that inevitable accompany motherhood.
I included a bunch of parenting pins in this post that unfortunately, are not real, but I, and probably thousands of other moms, wish they were. I’m waiting for someone to write on these topics, because personally, I’m clueless.
Because this is reality. My husband and I share a full-sized bed, so when my sprawling four-year-old decides to join us, I’m left wondering how best to make do with the limited real estate available. Anyone wanna share secrets?
Am I the only one? The gross part is when you don’t notice stuff is there until later and it gets hard. For the record, there hasn’t actually been poop on the walls at our house. Yet. We’ve had blood, though, from my son’s bloody nose. He has sensory processing disorder and goes crazy when his nose bleeds.
I know this has happened to you. You were having a peaceful meal at Red Lobster, when all of a sudden, your toddler loses his mind. Screen time doesn’t work, candy doesn’t distract him, and the only available measure is to remove him from the situation. But … you’re not done eating … I just want solutions, that’s all. Someone? Write a blog post?
This goes out to all the moms with babies and multiple kids under five. Because, can I get a witness?
I personally have never had to call Poison Control. Not once. Not when my son ate Vicks or Vaseline. And I wouldn’t be able to tell you which of those are harmless either. Nope. Because I’m a good parent.
Seriously. Any help out there in the Pinterverse? Because half of the time when my two-year-old is talking, I just smile and nod. Unless he’s talking about Thomas the Tank Engine, which he does all day. Then it’s crystal clear.
I have two in diapers. One is four. Autism. Not because I’m a bad parent. I keep bringing that up. Maybe my subconscious is telling me something. Anyway, they kick hard. Often. It’s not fun.
This would be magical! Maybe it’s asking too much, though …
Toddlers throw. When they’re mad. When they’re glad. When they’re sad. They throw toys, food, coffee pots, chairs, fruit bowls … okay, that last one was Jac, who technically isn’t a toddler, but he has autism, so it counts. If there are any solutions floating out there for this one, I want to hear them.
I had to delete a pin because I wanted ten, but while I was writing this, I kid you not, one of my kids pooped in the bathtub. And then the other (boy, of course) peed while he was standing up. And thought it was hilarious. So I have to add this one:
I really wish these pins existed, because I would pin them, and click through to the post and read them, and my life would be changed for the better. But alas, I must suffer. If there are any bloggers out there who have a heart, write a post on one of these imaginary pins, and I’ll link to you for the better of mother-kind.
These are hilarious! Poop in the tub is the worst feeling! Thankfully it’s only happened to us a couple of times, but that’s still more than enough…
Yeah, this was my first! So gross!!
Brilliant post, laughed out loud! I have seen one solution to the restaurant problem. A mother who let her son have an enormous tantrum on the floor, then went round apologising to the other diners saying they are sorry but they are ignoring him til he learns to stop. Braver than I am. I just get out the ipad/phone, pray it works, and feel self conscious that everyone is judging me for being a bad parent when probably no-one cares! If you ever start one of these pins, let us know. Especially for what to do when you spot a floater in the bath. Only happened to me once and I literally froze in horror 🙂
Haha! My husband would not approve the restaurant scenario
So funny and a great reminder that I’m not the only one that is in these situations! Thanks! ?
Haha, yep! It’s an adventure !
I love these ideas! Now I seriously want to do a tips post on these – been through them all, and most numerous times. I actually went through a combo of a couple of these with my first. He was still in a diaper at 3 – note that I refuse to apologize for this 🙂 – and decided to stand in the middle of a restaurant, clutch a table and grunt as loud as you can imagine while dropping a deuce in his pants. Good times.
That is hilarious! I have two in diapers, but my oldest has autism. Write the posts!
I think you gave me ideas, because I know of a few ways to deal with poop in the tub…not all are good, more like natural reaction, but hey…
Haha, awesome! It would be a hilarious post if you could combine matter-of-fact how-to with the obvious humor
Susan, this is so funny and I think you have a duty to make those pins for real!! We need help! 😀
Haha, right??!!! Maybe I’ll work on that. Or if you have any ideas??
hahahaha! These are too funny. Sad that I feel like I should write about some of these, lol!
Haha! Please do!
the bed is totally us! From infant (co-sleeping on and off) even to now when our LO is 3! We have a queen size bed, but we also have a small dog. so between the adults, dog, and kid we have hardly any space!
Yup. Fun times!
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Hello, Susan. It’s Erin. yes poop. Junior from 2-3 years of age, for some reason would hide and smear poop on walls or toys outside. Stopped for awhile just couple submarines in tub. Autism what an experience.
Wow, that’s crazy! I found poop on the walls just once, but fortunately none of my kids like to touch it!