10 parenting pins we need to exist

Pinterest is full of inspiring idea and encouraging articles. The pins are usually so gorgeous and perfect. But that’s not always what you’re looking for. Sometimes you need a post that addresses the nitty gritty of motherhood. Not just a pretty pin to save for later, but something that addresses the embarrassing topics that inevitable accompany motherhood. 

I included a bunch of parenting pins in this post that unfortunately, are not real, but I, and probably thousands of other moms, wish they were. I’m waiting for someone to write on these topics, because personally, I’m clueless. 

Because this is reality. My husband and I share a full-sized bed, so when my sprawling four-year-old decides to join us, I’m left wondering how best to make do with the limited real estate available. Anyone wanna share secrets?

Am I the only one? The gross part is when you don’t notice stuff is there until later and it gets hard. For the record, there hasn’t actually been poop on the walls at our house. Yet. We’ve had blood, though, from my son’s bloody nose. He has sensory processing disorder and goes crazy when his nose bleeds. 

I know this has happened to you. You were having a peaceful meal at Red Lobster, when all of a sudden, your toddler loses his mind. Screen time doesn’t work, candy doesn’t distract him, and the only available measure is to remove him from the situation. But … you’re not done eating … I just want solutions, that’s all. Someone? Write a blog post?

This goes out to all the moms with babies and multiple kids under five. Because, can I get a witness?

I personally have never had to call Poison Control. Not once. Not when my son ate Vicks or Vaseline. And I wouldn’t be able to tell you which of those are harmless either. Nope. Because I’m a good parent. 

Seriously. Any help out there in the Pinterverse? Because half of the time when my two-year-old is talking, I just smile and nod. Unless he’s talking about Thomas the Tank Engine, which he does all day. Then it’s crystal clear. 

I have two in diapers. One is four. Autism. Not because I’m a bad parent. I keep bringing that up. Maybe my subconscious is telling me something. Anyway, they kick hard. Often. It’s not fun. 

This would be magical! Maybe it’s asking too much, though …

Toddlers throw. When they’re mad. When they’re glad. When they’re sad. They throw toys, food, coffee pots, chairs, fruit bowls … okay, that last one was Jac, who technically isn’t a toddler, but he has autism, so it counts. If there are any solutions floating out there for this one, I want to hear them. 

I had to delete a pin because I wanted ten, but while I was writing this, I kid you not, one of my kids pooped in the bathtub. And then the other (boy, of course) peed while he was standing up. And thought it was hilarious. So I have to add this one:

I really wish these pins existed, because I would pin them, and click through to the post and read them, and my life would be changed for the better. But alas, I must suffer. If there are any bloggers out there who have a heart, write a post on one of these imaginary pins, and I’ll link to you for the better of mother-kind.